Tuesday, December 14, 2004


I have to go in for a colonoscopy this week. Second time ever. The first was shortly after being diagnosed years ago. I still remember it well. The worst part was knowing months in advance. That isn't the case this time. It's only been about 3 weeks forewarning. It was supposed to happen in February but since my employer is changing insurance companies, I figured it would be better not to piss off the new one so soon into my coverage. There's always the worry about pre-existing conditions.

We were told that wouldn't be a problem with this change. But they're not handling the paperwork very well (my employer, their help, whoever is processing) so I still worry about problems. Always.

The prep this time is brutal. The only thing I remember about the preparations last time was the suppositories. Thought that was pretty gross. Dr. Sadist has other plans for this prep. Nasty stuff. Have to drink a ton of liquid as well as take stuff that will intentionally cause a problem (cause me to go and go and go). That's terrifying! Is he crazy?

The whole point is to clean out my insides. Sure, I get that but what I don't understand is why is has to be so traumatic. Laxatives?? Enema?? Torture! For someone with 2 bowel diseases??

Absolute torture. (especially the worry beforehand!)

I was considering just fasting for 2-3 days. Maybe that will be good enough. I've gone a week without eating, living mainly on coffee (cigarettes) and water. I can do it. Sure. But will he know? That's the worry. I'm afraid that I won't be able to stop. And how am I supposed to work without the Imodium? All liquids, no Imodium. That's worrisome too.


Phosphosoda, Dulcolax, enema.
Yuck Yuck! Yuck!

I bought apple juice, white grape with peach (no pulp), vegetable broth, Mountain Dew, Canada Dry ginger ale, and diet Coke with lemon. These will be my "liquids."

I can't wait until this procedure is over. He (dr sadist) said I was due. It's been ____ (7-8?) years and it's time to "check what's going on in there" he said. Oh Joy.

The odd part is, at least 5 of my coworkers have had a colonoscopy within the last 5 months. Is there a run on them lately? A special at every hospital? Maybe there's an incentive for all doctors to try and schedule as many as possible, some bonus we never hear about. They're not all performed by gastroenterologists. I wonder how an internal medicine doctor's procedure differs from a gastroenterologists. Maybe it's the same. The prep isn't! Of all the people I know who have had to do this recently, only one had to go through a grueling prep (like I do). No fair!

I wish this was over already.


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